this weather sucks. it's too cold to go out, too cold to even think about it in fact. the idea of staying in tonight doesn't do me though, so i may go to a party. i may change my mind about that too. very scattered thoughts today, accompanied by a ton of tension.

Eric leaves Monday, and Catie is tense. she's making ME tense, and being quite the pain in the ass. her mood swings are driving me insane, so i try to avoid confrontations with her, and have no problem with her spending most of her time in her room. i'm sure that will change once Eric leaves, and we'll be right back to the "why can't you stay home?" bullshit. it doesn't make a difference if i'm here or not really, because she'll be on the phone all the time, again. BUT, she wants me here. her control freak nature is getting on my nerves. i have earned the right to go out anytime i choose to, regardless of how guilty she makes me feel, period.

Scott gets under my skin, Duane is a complete ass and has zero business sense, Jason is a putz, and i've had just about enough of everyone.

maybe i should take a nap.

i need a new job. i love my job, but i don't love the owner. pretty sad that i haven't gotten paid from Friday because he used that money to go out drinking all week. he'll get his today though. i'm not playing this game. i'll be taking the fares from the next day or two to pay my own self, then i'll be taking my percentage each time i work from now on.

fire me. i dare you.

i'm bored today already. what to do, what to do..

so, we get to hear the baby's heartbeat this coming Thursday. i have to admit, i'm getting a little excited. now it's really real, and i've come to terms with it all. if she has twins though, i'll be leaving the country.

work has been a pain in my rear end the last few weeks, but now that we've fired the guy who was disrupting the flow, things should get a bit better. there was way too much stress involved, and i was getting quite fed up with being the sounding board for all the complaining, so whew.

the men in this town are nearly insane, but a source of entertainment. evidently if you tell someone they're cute, you're automatically dating. if, heaven forbid, you kiss any one of them, you're engaged. i won't even go further with this..lol

i am absolutely looking forward to having three straight days off. i may just go to bed and stay there until Monday.

so i went snowmobiling for the first time last friday. i thought i'd hate it, but nope. i LOVED it. at first my friend was going slow, around 35mph. we stopped at a bar to have coffee which is when i informed him he could go a little faster. on the way back he did, close to 60mph, and it was fantastic. of course i couldn't feel my chin for about 45 minutes after the fact and my hair looked like hell, but it was worth it. i almost fell off at one point because we hit a rut in the snow, and i was hanging on with one cheek..lol but i was able to scootch back on without incident. we're going again after the next snowfall.

i've been doing and trying so many more things lately. i'm not sure why, and i don't care why either, i'm just glad i am. at this rate i'll have to change the title of my blog! :D

i got a late Christmas present. my daughter is having a baby. o.O

i'm not exactly sure how i feel about this at the moment, but i'm sure as the time gets closer, i'll be as excited as she is. but for now.. *sigh*

finally

so the holidays are over, and what a relief. unfortunately, winter is upon us, so let the depression begin. it's terribly cold this year, more so than usual, and the snow and ice have been a bit much for my tastes. aside from being dangerously slippery, it's impossible to even go for a walk due to the winds. ive even had to push the dogs outside because they don't want to be out there either..lol this weather is wrecking havoc on my RA to boot, and there are many days i can barely get out of bed, no less shower and get dressed. damn my doctor. she may be right about the methotrexate, but i'm still protesting.

speaking of which, what the hell is up with all these other doctor's lecturing me on what meds i take? they're not my rheumy, so shut it already. i almost blew a gasket when i saw the hand surgeon last week because all he wanted to do was give me lame analogies about what he thinks i should be taking, and never addressed the reason i was there in the first place. shit, i walked out of his office so annoyed, it almost ruined my day. so now i still have a huge ganglion cyst that hurts like a bitch, yet he tells me metho won't make it go away, so wtf do i need to take that crap for? i know they're all sending messages to each other about it, even though i told my rheumy i don't appreciate being ganged up on. what seems to make any doctor think they can pressure me into taking something i don't want to take? they don't know me very well at all. i despise being bullied and i sure as hell don't like being told what to do. jackasses.

anyway, fun times ahead for the next three months.

not.

The Perfect Tree has arrived

well, we got it. the "perfect tree". we went to a tree farm and cut our own. i didn't, she didn't, nick did..lol. anyway, after finding out the 4-wheel drive doesn't work as we slid and stalled for a few minutes (and grinded the gears for a bit too as i sweated and panicked that we were destroying the tranny, cursing them for even suggesting we switch from part time to 4-lo), nick and i found it.

not cate, as she was staging a sit-in in the jeep. she decided at some inane point in time after quite a while of slipping through snow, ice, and across stumps, that we "didn't know anything about trees" and sat her ass inside.

for $35 we got a tree that has successufuly stabbed, poked, stung, and even kept the animals away from it.

but it's pretty. this is the first time in ten+ years i've had a real tree in my home.

awesome :D